Monday, January 7, 2013

Goodbye, 2012!

Time really flew by. Usually after I blog, I get revved up and can't wait to do it again. This time, not so much. I just couldn't get into the flow of it. Possibly because I didn't want to write about things and rehash all those memories in my mind. Writing forces me to think...really think things through, and I was getting to the point that I just wanted to forget...I didn't want to be sad anymore.

I'm moving on...I'm happy to be where I am. Mostly. Every once in awhile, fragments of the times I had in LOL and Tampa poke through and the sadness threatens to swallow me whole. It's in these times that I wonder: where is God? Why am I devastated, on the brink of inconsolable, while he has moved on with no problem? Even thinking about it now makes me well up. I often feel that God is not doing anything and praying is not worth it.

I opened up the Bible Verses folder in my email box, and this is what I got:

Hebrews 10:35-36

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.

Persevering gets tiring; especially when I don't see a result. People (other Christians) say that God often works "behind the scenes" and we rarely see it. I guess that's where faith comes in; believing that God is working even when we don't see it. Maybe in 2013, I need to set a resolution to display more faith. And not just say it...but really believe it.

I think starting a new tradition in this blog might help...or give me something to write about anyway. Last year, I signed up for shortly before I got my kindle and I consequently developed an interest in reading. (Better late than never, huh?) It would be cool for me to review the books I've read and talk about what I am reading. Thanks to (throwing websites at you today), I have over 100 books on my kindle that I haven't had to pay for. Everyday, Inspired Reads offers great Christian fiction and non-fiction for the kindle that is FREE.

I actually paid for this book, but it's the first book I finished this year.

Kiss by Ted Dekker and Erin Healy

Description (from

Let me tell you all I know for sure. My name. Shauna.

I woke up in a hospital bed missing six months of my memory. In the room was my loving boyfriend - how could I have forgotten him? - my uncle and my abusive stepmother. Everyone blames me for the tragic car accident that left me near death and my dear brother brain damaged. But what they say can't be true - can it?

I believe the medicine is doing strange things to my memory. I'm unsure who I can trust and who I should run from. And I'm starting to remember things I've never known. Things not about me. I think I'm going crazy.

And even worse, I think they want to kill me.

But who? And for what? Is dying for the truth really better than living with a lie?
This book was completely different from what I expected. That's not always a bad thing, right? In this case, it's most definitely not. Dekker weaves a story of conspiracy, intrigue, and suspense. It's difficult to know who to trust and "first" impressions are not what they seem.
Starting off, I automatically feel for Shauna (main female character), as she has no idea where she is and while trying to get answers, her credibility is ruined by Patrice (her stepmother). From there, we are taken on a ride with Shauna and her "boyfriend" Wayne to find her missing memories. She finds that she can steal memories from others by close physical contact and a willing spirit. Shauna's journey leads her to unravel a conspiracy reaching all the way to her father, Landon, a senator.
I give this book 4 stars. I didn't quite get all the nuances...but I got enough to understand the "mystery"  

1 comment:

  1. Glad you see you are back to blogging. I know how you are feeling with the lack of "energy" to just stick with something and do it. I find myself not following through on things that I say I want to do and would probably benefit me but then I get into that feeling of "what is the use?" But I bet you felt good when you finally finished this blog. Let's make a pact not to let the devil have his way and discourage us from doing things that make us feel better. Because I know I for one really like reading your blogs and getting know you better this way. 2013 is going to be a better year for you and for me. It may not be perfect but we will be better off for our experiences in it.